Sanctuary in the Abyss
How far can one truly fall?(Samurai Jack)
“50 years have passed, but I do not age. Time has lost its effect on me. The suffering continues."
How do you find joy when your goals are nowhere in sight? For half a century, life has been nothing but agony and failure. You’ve been fighting for so long that it's hard to find an incentive other than survival.
So many times have you come close, only to have it ripped away at the last second. As long as the mission continues, your loved ones will be confined to your dreams. As you begin to lose your sense of self, the days blend as time becomes an afterthought.
With ambition fading away into the distance, you start a change for the worse. The endless searching picks at your rationality. Flooding you with negativity as you lose sight of everything significant.
The world is not the safe haven you once called home. Shrouded in darkness and despair, the memories of the past make sure you have no peace.
Reminder of Failure
The recollections of the torment your people are going through stain your very essence. With home located in a perpetual state of misery, hallucinations begin to test your resolve at every waking moment. Your vision is filled with their faces covered in fire and eyes darker than the ashes on their skin.
Happiness is absent when you're emotionally assaulted whenever you close your eyes. With death written all over your face, it's hard to justify why you even draw breath. Everything precious is now gone with the wind. Your sword, your drive, your will are now dust.
"He destroyed everything! Everything is burning! You've forgotten your purpose!". "You've forsaken us!"
Suspicious of every corner, you write a new definition of paranoia. How can I find clarity when everything I love drowns in the toxicity of Aku? With doubt crawling up your spine, staying focused is impossible. Disaster is not approaching; it's staring you in the face. You hear whispers of nonsense and begin to question if the voices in your head are true.
The Voices of Duplicity
You live in a mental landscape where every hateful thought comes to life. With the mind becoming your biggest enemy, how does one cast a strike when the opponent is within?
Apprehension and tension come to run freely while giving you every reason to surrender to the demons plaguing your life. The excuses begin to sound like facts. Losing your grip on self-worth, the walls start to cave in.
Your inner conscience morphs into a spirit that adores multiplying your insecurities, relishes in your depressions, and feeds on your hate.
Belief leaves your body, and the voices begin to grow louder. With no chance for escape, one is surrounded by their own egregious notions. Tormenting your soul until the bitter end while shooting insults that cut deeper than the sharpest knife.
What bothers us the most is that maybe these ideas are right. The thoughts of suicide dance peacefully as they beg you to take that final step. In the distance, an opportunity awaits to silence all of the cerebral critics.
Death Follows
Stalking you from the shadows, an entity waits patiently for your weakest moment. There's a dark thought that lies in the back of everyone's mind: What if I give up? What happens when life has finally become too much to bear? Looking at the mess you've made, the stench of failure permeates the air.
The guilty conscience runs rampant as you come to the terrible realization that there is no hope. The conclusion that life has no meaning is what the beast of night was waiting for. You have given everything to help those in need, yet their blood warms your hands.
Inching closer to the edge, somehow, disembowelment sounds easier than living in this hell. Depriving yourself of self-worth, you live a false truth that your anguish is warranted. Letting the gravity of self-loathing crush you, The Samurai in black armor wants to embrace the sweet silence of death.
A fool’s way out of the valley of self-pity is by plunging in deeper into the pool of deceit. The body folds under its lack of willpower. You are deaf to the sound of positivity until someone decides to show that you matter.
My Purpose
One must climb out of the darkness and grab hold of one's resolve.
You can choose to entertain the questions that anxiety throws our way.
We can let the doubt keep us chained to the floor.
Let the rage from failure strip our humanity,
Allow seismic amounts of grief to shake your core,
Why feel anything when all you know is heartbreak?
"The decisions you make and the actions that follow are a reflection of who you are. You cannot hide from yourself.
When does one decide that life can’t break them anymore? There is no guarantee that life will pan out as promised, and getting back on your feet is easier said than done. New obstacles will always present themselves at the worst times, but abandoning your goals is never an option.
The battle wounds of the past may keep you grounded for some time, and the road to recovery can be littered with glass. Starting from zero is more than just a humbling experience, but it all begins with a choice to be better.
Climbing Out
Negative self-reflection can be the downfall for many. Sometimes the vitriol we speak to ourselves is unprecedented. Plenty are way harder on themselves than they would be on any other.
Sometimes the person we hate the most is staring back at us in the mirror. Akin to Aku, deception comes in all forms. Twisting and warping reality all for you to live in shame.
After spending your entire life helping others, you failed to recognize the scale of your impact. You became the representation of something so much more, transcending to a plane that no ordinary man could achieve.
You became the hero that everyone prayed for. A selfless warrior who has been trapped by the woes of time. Someone who exhausted so much time changing everyone else's destiny besides their own. Even going as far as sacrificing his own dreams to save a stranger.
You Carry Their Dreams
The path to purpose may become clouded, but let your heart show the way. On some days, finding the stimulus to keep trying will be difficult; however, your destiny is set in stone.
So many unexpected twists and turns are trying to derail your cause. But finally, you see through the haze of lies. Reaffirming the certitude that past, present, and future depend on you and you alone.
Hope cannot become a foreign memory as life drags you down further into the Abyss. As your nails are being scraped by the gravel, the memories of all those who depend on you flash before your eyes. How does one find the motivation to keep going when one's existence is just another extension of misery?, They move forward.
-Thank You So Much for Reading